Yep . . .That IS what he said.

Category Archives: Bad Dates

Surprise! You’re the “other woman”.

never said my divorce was final

Listen. When I took you out to dinner and brought you home, I thought you were doing that with the knowledge that my soon-to-be-ex-wife will be stopping by in the morning to pick up more of her stuff. Oh, and please disregard her panties hanging up to dry in the bathroom. You didn’t know I still had a wife? Well. That’s your fault. You should have checked my facebook  relationship status.


Love comes with patience and understanding. . .

Ride the rollercoaster

. . . Except when the man you’re dating thinks he’s twelve. You owe her one oversized stuffed animal from the water gun game, buddy!


Sometimes, there’s more drama offstage than on.

You haven't told her

I’m going to wager that his thoughts, had we filled in the words instead of a lingering ellipsis, would have been something like this.


This would be one thing if the guy was only, say, twelve years old. Or if they had been hanging out for longer than 45 minutes.

(click to enlarge)

(click to enlarge)

I can hear the taunting from here…. Cowboy Jim likes girls, oooooh!

But seriously, lying is better than admitting I would hang out with you.


What’s better than being taken out to dinner by your honey?

Don't order a drink

I’m all about being as frugal as possible, but if you’re taking someone out? Bitch can get a drank! If you’re that broke, take her on a long romantic walk.

Also, be kind to your waiters. Please don’t shout, “waiter!” Although in the context of this comic it is pretty perfect.


To round out the weekend, I thought I’d level the playing field a bit. Here’s a quote by everyone, ever.

I'll Call you

Not even if you and I had the last phones on earth.


Suddenly, whatever is happening on your Monday isn’t going to seem so bad…

lube and gelYou’re welcome.



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