Peter Pan! Get over it!
May he find what he seeks and have the bank account to maintain it. Fly free, you withered, aging asshole.
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Facepalm.
This might be the worst compliment ever. Not because there is anything wrong with size 4 or any other size out there, but because he’s using the compliment to make himself sound like a better person by hinting that he might be the best she can get.
She might as well have said, “I really love your face. A lot of women don’t like it, but I enjoy being with someone who’s less attractive than me.”
The narration here is actually still from the original comic. But the idiocy was all his.
The only time this answer is appropriate is when she chooses to dress as Lolita for Halloween. But…if she chooses to dress as Lolita for Halloween? Run.
Also, I love that the chick in the original comic was planning to use her gaping keyhole dress to manipulate Joe into doing…something. And everything has exclamation marks!
As a recently-turned 28-year old, this reader submission pretty much sums up my (very first world) worst nightmare.
Date over. Now. I need to go home, eat a pint of Ben & Jerry’s, drink half a bottle of Pinot Grigio and schedule a meeting with the undertaker to see if he can formaldehyde the crows feet off my face.
Big news today from ThingsMyExSaid: We’re switching from posting twice a week to three times a week! Keep an eye out for new posts every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday!
And to celebrate, here’s a classy gent:
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So keep your stories coming on our submission page! We’ll be back on Wednesday with a new horrific comic.
Since I haven’t had any presidential quotes yet submitted (that I know of!), in honor the new acting job I’m starting today I’ve posted a quote that’s near and dear to my heart. Cheers!
thingsmyexsaid 