Yep . . .That IS what he said.

Tag Archives: cheating

We’re back! And don’t worry, we’re keeping it classy.

do four chicks

I wonder if he found them.

Got a stupid ex? Want to see his or her quote up here in anonymous infamy? Submit your quote to ThingsMyExSaid!


Wow!!! Today we celebrate 1500 subscribers! That’s amazing, you all. I’m so happy that this little site I started almost a year and a half ago has reached so many people. It’s been great fun to share everyone’s stories on the site, so far. I’m looking forward to the next phase of Things My Ex Said! Let’s keep the dialogue going! 😀

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You’re studying! Or working. Or otherwise busy. So really, it’s your fault that I’m flirting with other women.

Also… MySpace? Seriously? This must be a dated quote, or this guy’s flirting skills are back in 2005.

Got a stupid ex? Want to see his or her quote up here in anonymous infamy? Submit your quote to ThingsMyExSaid!


Here’s our third highlight from Things My Ex Said: the Cabaret! Next week we’ll be back to our regularly scheduled programming. 🙂

Hope you’ve enjoyed these highlights from the show! Performed May 16, 2014 in the Grand Ballroom at Sloan’s, Glasgow. Produced by the Royal Conservatoire of Scotland.

Cast:
Heather Gault
Thomas Putman
Suzanne Boreel
Curtis Brown
Cassie Muise

Music Direction and Arrangement by Douglas Price
Script by Heather Gault and the Contributors to http://www.thingsmyexsaid.com


I see what you’re trying to do here with your feminine wiles. You’re trying to snare me.

Entrapment

Umm… no dude. She probably just wants to know how likely you are to give her an STD.

Come see your favorite quotes brought to life NEXT WEEK in ThingsMyExSaid: the Cabaret! May 12th and 16th, 7:30 PM in the Grand Ballroom at Sloan’s Glasgow. Part of the Royal Conservatoire of Scotland’s Candid Cabaret Series.


I sure seem to get a lot of quotes that touch on this theme. Makes me wonder. . . how many dates with a douche does it take to get to this point? One? Two? Three? Ten? It’s like the tootsie pop riddle for the new millennium.

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I’m going to venture that no, she doesn’t.

Got a stupid ex? Want to see his or her quote up here in anonymous infamy? Submit your quote to ThingsMyExSaid! And stay tuned next week for all-new comics by our first guest artist!


If somebody actually “allows” you to do this, maybe it’s not the right circumstance to say thank you. I think that’s gotta be the kind of thing where you push it deep under the rug and never talk about it again.

. . .Do you think he said please?

the affair

Okay. I think this one needs more explanation. Like, did she actually allow him an affair? Does she get to have one now, too? Did he actually think she could stop him? “What if” she kicked him in the face?


Sometimes, there’s more drama offstage than on.

You haven't told her

I’m going to wager that his thoughts, had we filled in the words instead of a lingering ellipsis, would have been something like this.


This is almost like one of those marketing tactics where you drop a worse bomb so that your bad news doesn’t seem so bad. Almost.

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Oh wait. That’s way f*cking worse.


What’s the quickest way to end an engagement? This.

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Ordinarily, I’d say she was the jerk for looking through his phone. However, when your sneaking suspicion turns out to be right… then it’s just women’s intuition.


I get an awful lot of quotes about people who have cheated on each other. But this guy has entwined his infidelity with a “blame-the-victim” mentality in a way I’ve never seen before.

I cheated on you

Yep. That’ll show her.



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