There are several elements to this submission that (for me, at least) make it one of our most confusing, ever.
Wait a minute… did he just accuse her of being a rapist? Is she a rapist? If the genders were reversed, would we perceive this scenario differently? Somehow, since she was the one who submitted this quote, I suspect she had no idea he wasn’t into their physical relationship. But seriously. What the hell is going on there? Why was he having sex with her? Guys, gals, folks in between: don’t have sex with people you don’t want to have sex with! Relationships are complicated enough.
Or what if she was, like, his dominatrix or something, and this was part of their role play….
Happy September! Got a stupid ex? Want to see his or her quote up here in anonymous infamy? Submit your quote to ThingsMyExSaid!
We’re back! And don’t worry, we’re keeping it classy.
I wonder if he found them.
Got a stupid ex? Want to see his or her quote up here in anonymous infamy? Submit your quote to ThingsMyExSaid!
When Things My Ex Said and Tinder collide… the results are exactly what you’d expect.
Music to bondage? Seems like a reasonable segue to me. Isn’t the “getting to know you” stage grand? At least he got right to the point.
Got a stupid ex? Want to see his or her quote up here in anonymous infamy? Submit your quote to ThingsMyExSaid!
Adultery is totally cool, but don’t you dare take the name of our Lord in vain.
Got a stupid ex? Want to see his or her quote up here in anonymous infamy? Submit your quote to ThingsMyExSaid!
Happy Valentine’s Day! One year ago today this little blog was born. And what a year it’s been! I couldn’t have done it, quite literally, without all of you. Thank you for your quotes and your input! Hopefully we’ve all had a chance to laugh at some cringe-worthy memories and make them a little less painful.
Coming up in 2014 we’ve got some big plans for Things My Ex Said! Stay tuned for guest artists, new levels of horrible exes, and so much more. But first, in honor of the Day of Love, here is the grossest, weirdest, least romantic quote I may have ever read.
The non sequitur. The presumption. The….herpes. Who is this person, and how do we keep him from ever telling someone she is “going to have to learn to love” his herpes, ever again? Listen, guy: It doesn’t matter which hole you’re aiming for. Keep that diseased stick and it’s entitled attitude zipped up.
Nobody is going to learn to love your herpes until you love yourself. Happy Valentine’s Day!
What’s the quickest way to end an engagement? This.
Ordinarily, I’d say she was the jerk for looking through his phone. However, when your sneaking suspicion turns out to be right… then it’s just women’s intuition.
Welp, it’s important to know what you want.
Because it doesn’t matter what I may say or do–as long as this is the sitcom where no matter how badly I screw up I still get laid? Life will be good.