So I started this site to make fun of and achieve catharsis from my (and your) shitty ex-significant-others. Here’s what happens when one of my not shitty ex-boyfriends starts reading the site.
Facepalm.
Are you serious?
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Here’s a tip for getting your mom’s present back from your girlfriend. Don’t give your mom’s present to your girlfriend.
In the middle of an emotional break up, this is absolutely the most important thing that can be discussed. Go get ’em, tiger!
Seriously? Now the scenario can go one of two ways:
1. No. Especially if the book is that good! Now she wants nothing more than to rip that book out of your clammy, callused fingers.
2. Yes. Because SHE CAN LORD OVER YOU the fact that at a time such as this, she won the emotional high ground, while you put your chips behind the fleeting, tawdry thrill of a book. Dude, I don’t know the specifics here, but unless she cheated on you it kind of sounds like she won the break up. But you enjoy that book of hers! Just try.
When date night goes south…
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And you were a lot more handsome with your mouth shut.
This might be one of my favorite break up excuses, ever.
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Well, he’s got a type, ladies!
Mixing money and man-love is probably not a good idea to begin with. But when poor decisions get rubbed in your face…
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Clueless or classless? You decide.
My new show opens tonight, so I thought I’d get a little personal.
Guess what? I am.
Guess what else? Surprise! I don’t look for a parent in my boyfriend. Sometimes this site is cathartic for me, too.
Never let somebody else tell you who or what to be. Especially not in the name of love. That’s not love.
Happy Memorial Day! I hope everybody enjoyed Arrested Development Day yesterday! I want you all to appreciate that it’s taking every ounce of my self control right now not to turn this entire website into pure Arrested Development fan fiction.
And now, without further ado, here’s some jerk one of you dated:
At least she knows what she wants! Oh wait . . .
thingsmyexsaid 