Yep . . .That IS what he said.

Category Archives: Hooking Up

Welp, it’s important to know what you want.

No matter how mad

Because it doesn’t matter what I may say or do–as long as this is the sitcom where no matter how badly I screw up I still get laid? Life will be good.

I can think of more than just the obvious reason not to have sex with this guy.

Click to Enlarge

Click to Enlarge

Clearly, he thinks the elephant in the room isn’t his absent girlfriend.

Suddenly, whatever is happening on your Monday isn’t going to seem so bad…

lube and gelYou’re welcome.

May you never be in a relationship that gets to this point:

intimacy and affection

Have an intimate and affectionate weekend, everybody! Whatever that means to you. Unfortunately for her, it meant some naked time.

The setting goes as follows. Guy asks girl to go on a trip with him. Girl agrees. Trip is booked. Guy gets weird.

What are you afraid of?

Yeah, that sounds about right.

For those of you keeping up with me, the transatlantic move was successful! Henceforth, ThingsMyExSaid will post every Monday-Wednesday-Friday morning in Greenwich Mean Time! Cheers!

When boinking your girlfriend just isn’t an option…



No shit, Sherlock.

When you’re actually lucky enough to get laid, never say this.

Boom Goes the DynamiteNever.

Ah, romance.


Got a romantic memory you are proud to say you’re ashamed of? Submit your quote here and see the scenes from your life immortalized in digital art!

You guys, this might be the worst coming out story I’ve ever heard.

Click to Enlarge!

Click to Enlarge!

No, she doesn’t want.

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